Friday, February 23, 2007


I remember this one dumb woman at Loyola School of Law, Carlotta or Carlena was her name. I believed she was of a mixed Spanish-Asian descent. I only mention this so that a mental image can be formed.

One day I walked into the Pine Street Café. Carlotta was sitting towards the back near the kitchen, in a booth against the wall, on the right, and facing me. We made eye contact. Carlotta/ Carlena began to move her head from side to side in a rhythmic manner while uttering the noises da duh, da duh, da duh, similar to the background soundtrack I had once heard in a cartoon wherein a herd of elephants, or other animal generally viewed as moving ponderously, was marching single file and the soundtrack was meant to convey the idea that these elephants were oblivious to the world around them. I approached her and stopped to face her at her table. I stated: "I couldn't hear the rocks from back there." A blank look came over her face. I stated it again and this time she got it.

That Carlotta/ Carlena was attempting to insult me by her act was not lost on me. The apparent insult was that I was dumb and oblivious to what was going on around me. Unknown to Carlotta/ Carlena, I was not at all oblivious to what was going on around me, I just wanted no part of it. This is why the woman was dumb, she did not understand the KISS principle. That is Keep It Simple, Stupid. Simply, why doesn't a married man not have sexual intercourse with any person other than his spouse? Da-duh, because he is married.

I am not attempting to imply that Carlotta/ Carlena and I had any conversations of great length prior to or after this. I had only spoken to the woman once or twice. Her action on this day only confirmed what I had thought when I had observed her in a clutch of hens apparently engrossed in some deep subject and they glanced at me too frequently.

You can take that rotten box and keep it,
Cause baby I don't need it.
Frank Zappa (actually referring to the television)

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