Sunday, February 25, 2007

How do you know that Mike Tyson had sex?

Pre-emptorily, my apologies to Ms. Allgood for having to relate what happened and my continued reflection on the experience.

The world will not be peaceful and safe until disarmament is complete. This may not occur until Marlene Allgood has reached menopause. Until such time, her right to keep and bear tampons cannot be taken away. Some nitwit on XOXO made the comment: "Regardless, Marlene Allgood has a strong case for libel." NOT. What an idiot. Jackass, it is the truth. The truth is a complete defense. She did it, get it?

Recently, I have been giving this incident with the tampon quite a bit of thought. My question is why would this classy woman swing a tampon under my nose? I first must set aside my simple knee-jerk presumptive opinion that the majority of female lawyers and female law students are of low moral character. Well, presuming that Victoria McDaniel is a lying slut that attempted and was successful in the completion of a preemptory 'strike' in case I did start to relate how sexually aggressive she had been, she could have said that I displayed or swung a condom under her nose. If this is among the acts that this lying slut attributed to me then I think that a more appropriate means of addressing the act could have been arrived at. For instance: asking me. At the time I would have been able to truthfully state that I had never purchased or used a condom in my life.

There are other reasons that I now think that Ms. McDaniel may have made that communication about me. In the fall of the year 2000, sometime after the incident with Marlene Allgood and the tampon, my wife purchased and brought home a condom. She asked that I use the condom. That was the single instance in my life that I had used a condom.

I had since, in the spring of 2001, bought a pack of three. I never used them, but had started thinking about it as something along the lines of: If you have no choice, when in Rome…. I am indebted to Camile Buras, Daryl Derbigny and Stephanie Jumonville, because if not for these jackasses I might have ended up using the condoms. I had plenty of opportunities.

Something else I finally figured out: The reason that there was a pattern of sexual aggressiveness interspersed with relative quite was because this woman, Victoria McDaniel, wanted me to chase her. She couldn't figure out that when I said I was not interested in sex, and made no sexual overtures, I really meant it.

In hindsight, I can now see that to most males that have never used a condom in their life that when one woman swings a tampon under your nose and then that males wife brings home a condom and asks him to use it, Victoria McDaniel wanted to have sex with somebody. This kind of thing must happen all the time. It is kind of like the question: How do you know that Mike Tyson had sex?

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